Listening Deeper: Why Inner Work Matters

For a long time, I believed that if I just did enough on the outside: exercised consistently, ate well, built relationships, stayed busy; peace would follow. But eventually, I realized something important: outer-work can strengthen the body and structure our lives, but it can't override subconscious patterns. No matter how healthy our routines are, we will continue to repeat the same emotional reactions, relationship dynamics, and stress responses if we don't look deeper. That realization is what led me to To Be Magnetic (TBM).

Your Nervous System Learns Before You Do

Science shows that our brains and nervous systems are shaped early; beginning in utero and continuing through childhood. These early experiences influence how we perceive safety, connection and worth.

When something triggers emotional heat such as anxiety, defensiveness, anger etc., it's often not about the present moment. It's a stored response. Neuroscience confirms that emotional reactions originate in the limbic system before the rational brain has time to interpret what's happening (LeDoux, 1996). This is why logic alone doesn't change patterns.

TBM helped me recognize how subconscious beliefs including people-pleasing and victim-based thinking were quietly driving my decisions. Once I could see those patterns, I could begin to rewire them through awareness, repetition and compassion.

"Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate." -Carl Jung

You Can't Out-Train Your Subconscious

Exercise, nutrition and relationships are essential but they work best in partnership with inner regulation. Stress research shows that unresolved emotional patterns increase cortisol, inflammation, and nervous system dysregulation (McEwen, 2007). Inner work isn't separate from health, it is health.

"You don't rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems." -James Clear

If the internal system is rooted in fear, self abandonment or over-responsibility for others, peace will always feel just out of reach.

Why Positivity Is Still the Starting Point

At the end of our lives, what truly matters?

• A negative attitude with a negative outcome

• A negative attitude with a positive outcome

• A positive attitude with a negative outcome

• A positive attitude with a positive outcome

No matter the result, positivity gives us the best possible experience of life.

Research in positive psychology consistently shows that optimistic outlooks are associated with better coping, improved immune function and stronger social connections (Fredrickson, 2001). Positivity doesn't mean bypassing pain, it means choosing responsibility, awareness and growth.

You Don't Have to Do This Alone

Inner work can feel vulnerable, confronting, and isolating, which is why we're starting a local/online To Be Magnetic community, known as Magnetic MeetUps. We all carry subconscious blocks. None of us are meant to work through them in isolation.

If you're curious about TBM, already signed up, or simply feel called to start your inner work journey, reach out. Connection matters and regulation happens faster together.

References

Fredrickson, B. L. (2001). The role of positive emotions in positive psychology: The broaden-and-build theory of positive emotions. American Psychologist, 56(3), 218-226. https://doi.org/10.1037/0003-066X.56.3.218

Jung, C. G. (1969). The archetypes and the collective unconscious (2nd ed.) Princeton University Press.

LeDoux, J. E. (1996). The emotional brain: The mysterious underpinnings of emotional life. Simon & Schuster.

McEwen, B. S. (2007). Physiology and neurobiology of stress and adaptation: Central role of the brain. Physiological Reviews, 87(3), 873-904. https://doi.org/10.1152/physrev.00041.2006

Clear, J. (2018). Atomic Habits: An easy & proven way to build good habits & break bad ones. Avery.